


Amortentia, My Love

by antonio_the_great



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Enjoy(?), Everyone Is Gay, F/F, Fluff, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Im tired, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Sexuality Crisis, and a tiny bit of innuendo, anway, because that's not what this is, duh - Freeform, i'm not sure if i'm happy with this or not, if you're here for a straight romance then i apologize, some of this is fluffy, specifically slytherin angst, there is some language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-09
Updated: 2018-12-09
Packaged: 2019-09-14 18:28:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16918050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/antonio_the_great/pseuds/antonio_the_great
Summary: The lives of sixteen Hogwarts students change, all because of a potion.





	Amortentia, My Love

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this because i wanted to show my love for some of my rarepairs (of which there are a lot.) sorry for overusing the amortentia trope. :/

**i.** Mandy

 

When Slughorn first brings out the Amortentia, Mandy knows what she will smell. She expects most people do. They’re horny sixth years, most of them have figured out who they’re attracted to. Like Mandy, and even so, it’s still jarring when she takes a whiff of the potion.

  
Afterwards, she heads on to her Defense Against the Dark Arts lesson, not exactly looking forward to it, because you know, Snape and all. even Hermione Granger is hated by him, and she’s the smartest girl in their year (not for the first time, Mandy wonders why Hermione wasn’t sorted into Ravenclaw). Mandy cringes to think of her former crush on the Gryffindor girl, way back in the third year. It’s embarrassing to fall for someone she hardly knows.

  
There’s a yell from behind her in the corridor. Mandy turns to see Padma, running towards her with a frenzied expression on her face. She reaches Mandy and links arms with her.

  
“How about that potions class, huh?” Padma asks. Mandy raises her eyebrows and nods, trying to rid herself of the ache in her chest. Padma doesn’t even know how Mandy feels about “that potions class,” how much it’s affected her.

  
“Isn’t it so weird that Harry Potter won the Felix Felicis? He’s pretty average at potions from what i can tell, at least, he was last year. How did he get so good?” Mandy shrugs.

  
“I heard he wants to be an Auror. Probably just showing some newfound initiative.” Padma nods. They reach the outside of Snape’s classroom with five minutes to spare. A group of Hufflepuff girls in front of them is giggling and blushing, no doubt about what they’d smelled in the love potion.

  
“What about the Amortentia?” Padma questions. She glances at Mandy warily, an almost tentative look on her face. “What-What did you smell?” Padma looks at her apprehensively. Mandy freezes.

  
“Er,’ she starts, but Padma cuts her off, a horrified expression on her face.

  
“I’m sorry, that was rude! I suppose that’s a personal question, sorry. You don’t have to answer. Sorry.” She looks sheepish and she’s flapping her hands around. It’s adorable.

  
Mandy pauses for a moment. She looks at Padma, really looks at her. Her hair is piled up in a messy bun on top of her head. Her beautiful brown eyes look embarrassed, and they don’t meet Mandy’s. Her hands are still moving relentlessly, and Mandy feels a sudden urge to take them in her own. She thinks about what she’d smelled in the Amortentia, and melts a little. The distinct scent of sage, always present in Padma’s hair, clinging to her like perfume. Hot cocoa, the reminder of countless evenings spent together in the common room, drinking by the fire and laughing, Padma’s eyes crinkling and her mouth splitting into a wonderful, wonderful grin, a grin that could fuel Mandy enough to make her able to conjure a thousand Patronuses. And beeswax, the beeswax lip balm that lies on Padma’s soft, soft lips. Mandy remembers, distantly, the crush she’d once had on Hermione Granger, and summons some Gryffindor courage. She gently holds Padma’s face and tilts her head up to face her. Padma’s hands falter, and Mandy stills them with one hand. Her heart beats faster and faster.

  
“I smelled you,” she murmurs, and she kisses her and Padma (Padma, Padma, Padma) kisses her back.

 

 **ii.** Terry

 

Terry has been aware of his crush on Anthony since their fourth year, when Anthony had taken Mandy Brocklehurst to the Yule Ball and Terry had felt a surge of envy. At first he’d brushed it off as feelings for Mandy, they were good friends and she was very pretty that night. But later, when he saw Mandy staring wistfully at Padma with Weasley, Terry had realized that he wasn’t jealous of this, and took comfort on Mandy’s part in the fact that Mandy and Padma were bound to get together in a few years, anyway. No, no, it was Anthony he had been jealous of, in his dapper dress robes and a grin on his face that could only be described as cute.

  
After having a minor sexuality crisis, Terry had come to the conclusion that it was a schoolboy crush, nothing important, and that it would disappear as quickly as it had come over him.

  
Yet. Now he’s a sixth year and Terry still likes him. And it’s annoying because they’re best friends, and Terry doesn’t want to ruin that, and Anthony’s probably straight anyway. But it’s hard to contain his feelings when Anthony’s draping his body over Terry while they sit in the common room, and Anthony’s smiling, and talking animatedly about the day, and smiling, and Terry can’t do it. He’s struggling, and deep down he knows that it’s only a matter of time before Anthony finds out, and when he does, Terry will be totally and completely fucked.

  
So when Slughorn calls on Terry and volunteers him (read: forces him) to tell the class what he smells in the love potion, Amortentia, Terry knows he’s screwed. The sensible side of his brain urges him to refuse, to bullshit his way out of it, but the Ravenclaw side knows that he can’t say no to a teacher, and Terry gives in. He clears his throat, rubs the back of his neck, clears his throat again, and tries to ignore the many pairs of eyes glued to him.

  
“Um. I can, I can smell Butterbeer? From the Three Broomsticks? And, er, wool. and...” Terry winces internally, knowing this will give him away. “...Princeton Peppermints,” he mutters. Slughorn nods approvingly, and tells the class to form a line so they can smell the Amortentia if they want, but Terry hardly hears him. From the middle of the line he can sense Anthony staring at him. Terry avoids his gaze and focuses on the fact that his life has just ended and he should strongly consider becoming a hermit and hiding in the Shrieking Shack for the rest of his life. He doesn’t notice Anthony coming back from the line to their table to begin work on the Draught of Living Death until Anthony coughs and Terry jumps slightly, shocked out of his moody thoughts. He braces himself for rejection, for fury, for Anthony to tell him, in front of everyone, that he could never love Terry. but when he forces himself to look at Anthony, Anthony’s smiling.

  
“Princeton Peppermints, huh?” He sounds nervous. Terry nods, face burning. because of course Anthony knows, he’s just being nice, he knows, it’s not like anyone else in their year is constantly sucking on peppermints, and why, why did Terry have to be trapped in this humiliating situation?

  
“Sandalwood. That’s what i could smell. In the potion,” Anthony says. And Terry’s head jerks up and he looks at Anthony and he knows.

  
“It’s you,” Terry whispers, and it isn’t a question. And Anthony just smiles.

  
Terry kisses him, and Padma whistles from the next table over, and Slughorn says, “Aha. Well, I suppose I should have expected that from the Amortentia. Shall we, er, get back to the lesson then?” And the Slytherins are hooting but Terry doesn’t care.

  
And when they break apart, Terry grins.

 

 **iii.** Parvati

 

It’s weird, being one of only three Gryffindor girls in her year. Usually there’s more, but that year had been a scarce one for the female side of Gryffindor, and the only other people Parvati shares a dormitory with are Lavender Brown and Hermione Granger.

  
Not that she’s complaining. She likes Hermione a fair bit, even though she has a strong distaste for Divination (how could anyone not adore Professor Trelawney? Mad.). They’re friends, but Hermione hangs out with Harry Potter and Ron Weasley more than anyone else, and Parvati sticks with Lavender.

  
Lavender. Lavender, who’s Parvati’s best friend, and hopeless crush. They just have so much in common, what with sharing a love for Divination and having been friends since first year. They do everything together, go to Honeydukes, do homework, gossip. Parvati will never forget the ugly feeling she’d felt when she’d seen Lavender at the Yule Ball with Seamus (Lavender used to have a giant and unapologetic crush on Seamus, although Parvati had been almost entirely sure that he “played for the other team.”) Even though Parvati knew she should’ve been happy to be not only a Triwizard Champion’s date, but also Harry Potter’s date, her heart simply wasn’t in it. Harry had been nice enough, but he also hadn’t been a very good date, and Parvati hadn’t had much fun. In part it was because she fancied girls. and Padma hadn’t had a great time either, as she had later told Parvati. Parvati figured she’d rather have been with her Ravenclaw friends than Ron, who had been too caught up in his own feelings for Hermione that he’d ignored Padma all night.

  
Needless to say, Parvati has been head-over-heels for Lavender since as long as she can remember, and it’s no surprise that the first thing she detects in the fumes of Amortentia is exactly that. Lavender. Followed closely by just-popped popcorn and Lavender’s perfume. And Parvati knew this would happen, and she resigns herself to unrequited love forever. Later in the dormitory, Lavender gushes that she’d smelled Ron Weasley in the potion, and Parvati smiles weakly and pretends to be happy for Lavender. When Lavender asks, Parvati makes something up about broom polish and dew, and Lavender says excitedly that it must be someone on the Quidditch team, and Parvati shrugs, hopelessly.

  
Just for a moment, she lets herself believe that Lavender might get over her infatuation with Ron, and maybe Parvati’s feelings could be returned. But she quickly snaps herself out of it. She doesn’t want to break her heart further.

  
Farther along in the year, Lavender and Ron start going out and Parvati tries to ignore the stabbing pains she feels whenever she sees the pair snogging in the hallway (which is often). Lavender spends all her time with Ron now, and when she’s not with Ron she’s talking endlessly about him, and Parvati hates it.

  
Later she realizes Harry and Hermione understand. They know what it’s like to love someone who’s in a relationship with someone else, pining over them relentlessly. And so does Seamus, she comes to find. And the four of them talk, like the pathetic losers they are, and for a moment, they are Parvati’s best friends in the entire world.

  
But she loves Lavender.

 

 **iv.**  Dean

 

Dean’s problem is that he’s attracted to the wrong person. He smells the potion, fully expecting to smell a broomstick and wildflowers and Ginny. Instead, his senses are invaded by the scent of a campfire, Chocolate Frogs, and tangerine. and he thinks, ok, that it could still be Ginny. but he realizes that it isn’t Ginny, and then he can’t breathe because he knows who he smells in the potion. 

  
It’s Seamus. It’s Seamus and Dean doesn’t know what to do.

  
It makes a little sense. They are best friends, about as close as Harry, Ron, and Hermione, maybe even closer. They’ve known each other forever, and while Dean knows Seamus is gay, and he’s come to terms with the fact that he’s bisexual himself, he almost doesn’t believe it. He’s dating Ginny Weasley.

  
But slowly, it starts to make more and more sense, and Dean gets it. He’s attracted to Seamus. He’s in love with Seamus Finnigan.

  
Hell.

  
The campfire. Seamus is always setting things on fire, whether accidentally or on purpose. It goes hand in hand with Seamus’s personality, and Dean often wonders why he doesn’t just carry a fire extinguisher around with him (then again, wizards probably don’t know what fire extinguishers are). He recalls a moment in the summer before their fourth year, when Dean had gone with Seamus to support Ireland at the Quidditch World Cup. The night before the match, Dean had sat at the campfire with Seamus, while Mrs. Finnigan slept, the two of them too excited for the next day to go to bed. They had talked and laughed, and eventually it had become too much for Seamus and he’d fallen asleep on Dean’s shoulder. And Dean had had this feeling, this feeling that he would give his life for Seamus, but anyone would do that for their best friend, but Seamus was more than a best friend and why hadn’t Dean realized this before now?

  
Chocolate Frogs. When Dean and Seamus had first met on the Hogwarts Express they had shared a compartment and they’d eaten Chocolate Frogs together. Slowly but surely, as the pile of empty Frog boxes grew, so did their friendship. By the time they had reached Hogwarts, it was almost like they’d known each other for years. Dean remembers when he’d been sick and had to miss a Hogsmeade trip and Seamus had brought him Chocolate Frogs back from Honeydukes.

  
Tangerine. Seamus always, always smells of tangerine. Dean had wondered why until the time he’d visited Seamus’s house for the first time, where tangerine trees grow in the backyard. He’d understood then. The smell follows Seamus wherever he goes.

  
Dean lies awake at night in his four-poster, thinking. He glances at Seamus across from him, turned on his side and face bathed in a beam of moonlight. His curls lay splayed on his pillow, and he looks so peaceful, contempt. And Dean realizes that Seamus is breathtakingly beautiful.

  
He turns toward the wall, away from Seamus. 'You like Ginny,' he tells himself. ‘She’s your girlfriend and you love her.’

  
But the last thing he can remember before falling asleep is the taste of tangerine on his lips.

 

 **v.**  Seamus

 

Seamus almost cries when he smells the Amortentia, because it’s Dean and he always knew it would be.

  
Dean is his best friend, the person who understands Seamus more than anything in the world, and Seamus loves him. Is in love with him.

  
But Dean’s with Ginny, and will never love him back.

  
The potion (the stupid, annoying, arse-faced potion) smells like Dean, and Dean’s hair, and Dean’s clothes. His paints. His bed. His house.

  
Pepper.

  
Vanilla.

That night, when everyone else is in the common room, Seamus locks himself in the dormitory bathroom and just cries. And cries. And cries. And thinks about Dean.

  
God.

  
He thinks of all the times he knew he was in love with Dean. The campfire at the World Cup, Seamus had fallen asleep and Dean had carried him inside, and Seamus woke up in his tent. Watching Quidditch with him, cheering on Gryffindor, excited and energetic. The Yule Ball, dancing with Lavender but stealing glances at Dean, wishing he were dancing with him instead. Last year, Dumbledore’s Army, learning the Patronus Charm, and the look on Dean’s face when a wisp of a fox had danced out of Seamus’s wand.

  
But also the look on his face when Ginny’s silver horse had galloped past.

  
Dean’s with Ginny, and he will never love him back.

  
Seamus remembers what had let him cast that Patronus. The thought of him and Dean sitting by the lake, leaning against a tree, Dean drawing a picture of Seamus and constantly having to remind him to sit still. Once he was finished, Seamus saw the sketch and almost kissed Dean right there, because it was beautiful and he was in love with him. Dean had looked at him, biting his lip, silently and self-consciously asking for Seamus’s approval, and Seamus knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with this boy. That had been the memory that finally allowed him to cast the Patronus Charm, and two days later, Seamus had found a drawing of a fox lying on his pillow.

  
Dean’s with Ginny, and he will never love him back.

  
Seamus loves Dean so much it hurts, physically hurts him to think about it. It isn’t some teenage infatuation, it’s realer and deeper than that and Seamus can’t stand it. He tells Harry, Hermione, and Parvati this, how it kills him to see Dean with Ginny every day. And they understand.

  
He loves him.

  
Paints.

  
Pepper.

  
Vanilla.

  
Dean’s with Ginny, and he will never love him back.

 

 

 **vi.**  Theo

 

He’s not surprised. not surprised at all. Which almost makes it worse, he thinks.

  
To Theo, Amortentia smells like cologne, Firewhiskey, and red wine. The only person Theo knows who smells like that is Blaise.

  
And he’s scared, though he’d never admit it. Because his parents are in league with You-Know-Who, and although Theo isn’t, he knows what will happen. The final battle will come, inevitably, and Theo will either run away or stay and fight with the Death Eaters. He doesn’t want that. He’d heard about Dumbledore’s Army last year, and wanted to join, but he’s a Slytherin. Slytherins aren’t the good guys. Theo reminds himself of this fact a lot. So he’d joined the Inquisitorial Squad, because Draco had asked him to.

  
Theo doesn’t envy Draco, especially not now. He’s not even really friends with him. He’s friends with Blaise, mostly. He was close with Pucey and Higgs, too, but they’ve graduated.

  
Theo almost doesn’t care that his parents don’t know he’s gay, and that they’d hate him for it because they’re Death Eaters, and he hates them for it.

  
So after the potions lesson, Theo corners Blaise, then drags him into a nearby broom cupboard. As soon as the door is shut, Theo faces him.

  
"I smelled you,” he tells him bluntly. Blaise raises an eyebrow.

  
“I figured you would,” he answers (Theo turns ever-so-slightly pink). “I smelled you,” he adds as an afterthought.

  
“Oh. Good,” Theo mumbles, heart beating out of his chest. “So what does this mean?” Blaise sighs, and Theo understands.

  
“I don’t know, honestly. There’s not much hope for it, I suppose. It could go many ways. Our parents find out, they disown us and hate us. Our parents don’t find out, they force us to become Death Eaters, and we fight. Our parents find out, despise us, and still force us to become Death Eaters. There isn’t really a happy ending.”

  
Theo swallows. “I wish there weren’t a war.”

  
“We all wish that.” Theo crumbles.

  
“Blaise, I. I love you,” he stutters, very fast. The cool and careless expression falls off of Blaise’s face. He reaches out to Theo and holds him.

  
“I love you, too. I don’t want to lose you.”

Theo realizes he’s crying. They both are, and they hold each other, in this broom cupboard, skipping class, at a school where everyone who isn’t in their own house hates them. Theo stands there, holding Blaise, breathing in his cologne, and crying. They break apart, Blaise brushes the tears from Theo’s cheeks. Cups his face and kisses him softly.

  
The world hates them, Nott and Zabini. There’s no way they can win. But just for that moment, they kiss each other and try to forget.

 

 

 **vii.**  Lavender

 

When Lavender first smells the Amortentia, she smells Ron, and she’s overjoyed. She’s liked him since last year, and has been waiting for a reason to make a move on him. She knows there are people waiting behind her, but she takes a second inhale to savor the scent of Ron Weasley. Now that she’s breathed deeper, she can really, really smell him, and there are more scents she hadn’t even detected before. Underneath the smell of parchment and freshly mowed grass are cloves, pomegranates, and Sugar Quills. Lavender frowns as she walks back to her seat. Those scents are familiar to her, but they don’t remind her of Ron. They remind her of someone else...but that can’t be right.

  
Lavender shakes her head. Ron’s smells were stronger, right? She’s attracted to Ron. She focuses her attention on Professor Slughorn and tries to forget about the second set of smells.

  
However, Lavender is later forced to confront it. There’s no avoiding the smell of Parvati’s pomegranate-scented perfume, it practically fills the dormitory, although it isn’t unpleasant. The fact of the matter is that Lavender Brown is attracted to Parvati Patil, a girl.

  
Lavender’s not gay. No, no, she likes men. 'Think of Ron, yeah, Ron, you like him.' And although this is the truth, she also likes Parvati. 'oh, Merlin. What. Why.'

  
She remembers hearing a rumor about Dean Thomas liking boys, but that can’t’ve been true, because Dean’s going out with Ginny Weasley. Lavender decides to ask him anyway.

  
“I’m attracted to men and women. I just happen to be dating a girl right now,” Dean answers, late one night in the common room. Lavender runs her tongue across her lips.

  
“And...what, what is that called?” She hopes against hope that Dean doesn’t suspect her.

  
“Bisexual.” Lavender nods, but her face must betray her emotions, because Dean is wearing a concerned expression.

  
“Lav, are you alright?” Lavender shrugs helplessly. Dean’s eyes widen slightly. He leans closer to her.

  
“Do you think that you’re bisexual?” he asks quietly. Lavender slowly nods, tears in her eyes. Dean pats her shoulder.

  
“It’s okay.” Lavender nods again (why can’t she speak?) and tries to look happy.

  
“Th-Thanks, Dean.” Dean smiles sympathetically at her.

  
So apparently liking boys and girls is a thing? Not that it matters, because Parvati isn’t gay, and Lavender likes Ron more.

Later on in the year she kisses Ron Weasley at a party in the common room, and although he’s a sloppy kisser, she feels fireworks.

  
They date for a long time. It’s mostly just snogging, and Lavender clings to Ron wherever he goes. Their relationship has really put a strain on her friendship with Hermione. Lavender supposes she likes Ron, too, but that’s her problem. She had plenty of opportunities to get to him first.

  
But sometimes when Lavender is with Ron, and they’re snogging in one of the arm chairs by the common room fire, she wonders what it would feel like to kiss Parvati. Do Parvati’s lips feel the same as Ron’s? Or are they softer, unlike Ron’s chapped ones? Would Parvati kiss tentatively and slow, or just dive in and go all out?

  
Towards the end of the year and the end of Lavender and Ron’s relationship, Lavender realizes when she catches a whiff of Amortentia in potions that pomegranates and cloves and Sugar Quills are the only thing she can smell.

 

 

 **viii.**  Blaise

 

Blaise realizes as soon as he enters potions class that all hell is about to break loose. He recognizes the potions bubbling on the table: Polyjuice Potion, Felix Felicis, Veritaserum, and - fuck - Amortentia.

  
Of bloody course.

  
Does Slughorn know that he’s causing sexual awakenings and relationship drama by having this potion out, or is he just an idiot? Probably the latter. Blaise groans internally and starts to imagine different ways to curse the stupid walrus mustache off Slughorn’s stupid bloody face.

  
And see, the problem is that Blaise is fully aware of how Amortentia will smell to him, and it’s killing him.

  
It’s not who it is that bothers him. Never. Although Blaise could potentially wreck their friendship if the other boy ever found out.

  
What bothers him is that it’s a boy. If his parents knew, they’d murder him. But at least it’s not a Gryffindor.

  
Rain, coffee, almonds. It’s Theo.

  
But who else would it be?

  
Blaise doesn’t know what he is, but he isn’t straight. He likes girls fine, but he likes Theo more. He doesn’t have a problem with it, but his parents certainly would. Blaise sighs. Why does life have to be so damn difficult?

  
When he exits Potions, he tries to avoid Theo on the way to Charms. Unfortunately, he runs into Tracey Davis, who grabs Blaise’s arm and starts to talk his ears off.

  
“Did you know that Vivian Wallace smelled Warrington in the Amortentia? Isn’t that simply mad? Honestly, how could anyone be attracted to Warrington? You remember Marcus Flint? Warrington looks a bit like him, I bet they’re related on the troll side of the family. Anyway, what did you think of the lesson?” Tracey’s looking up at Blaise with a hopeful expression that makes her look like an idiot, and Blaise tries his best to not laugh out loud.

  
“Oh, you know. stuff,” Blaise answers nonchalantly. Tracey looks disappointed. She holds Blaise’s arm tighter.

  
“Well, it’s alright if you don’t want to tell. I only thought that you might want to let me know, since we’re friends.” They’re not friends. Besides, it’s pretty clear Tracey has something a little more than “friends” in mind. Tracey opens her mouth to say something else, but is interrupted by another voice.

  
“Oi, Blaise!” It’s Theo (Blaise could kiss him right there). “Sorry, Tracey, could i borrow Blaise for a moment?” Tracey scowls.

  
“I guess so,” she mutters, but Theo wrenches Blaise away from her before she can finish. He drags Blaise down the hall and into a nearby broom cupboard, then whirls around to face him.

  
“I smelled you,” Theo says breathlessly, and oh.

  
Oh.

  
Blaise attempts to pass it off as no big deal. “I figured you would,” he replies, trying to ignore his heart thumping like a herd of centaurs.

  
“Oh. Good,” Theo says, staring at Blaise. “So what does this mean?”

  
And Blaise doesn’t know. He doesn’t know what it means, and he tells Theo this, and now Theo’s crying, and now Blaise is crying, and fucking hell! He holds Theo like he’s a life raft and dimly, he’s reminded of the fact that they’re going to be late for Charms, but he doesn’t care because he loves Theo.

  
Life sucks, and probably always will, but at least Blaise isn’t alone.

 

 

 **ix.**  Ernie

 

Ernie is not good at deciphering his feelings. At least, not his romantic ones. He’d thought that Hannah was simply his friend for a while there, but then eventually came to the conclusion that that wasn’t all he saw her as. Of course, that was third year. Hannah’s back to being purely Ernie’s friend, and Ernie is still having trouble working out his romantic emotions.

  
Which is why when Ernie starts appreciating Justin’s company, and his eyes, and his jokes more often, he thinks Justin is simply just his friend. Until, Slughorn’s first Potions class of the year, and ah, no, wait.

  
Huh. In the Amortentia Ernie can smell Justin’s favorite caramel Muggle treats, and Justin’s hair gel, and the general musk of Justin that can only be described as home, and Ernie feels foolish for needing a love potion to see what should be pretty obvious.

  
Ernie is nothing if not an honest Hufflepuff, so that night, while Justin and Ernie are in their dormitory (and Zacharias is God knows where), Ernie drops his Transfiguration homework and tells him.

  
“Jus. you know the Amortentia?” Justin hums (he’s been oddly quiet all afternoon), concentrating more on his Herbology notes than what Ernie has to say. Ernie takes a deep breath.

  
“I smelled you.” It’s quiet. Justin’s frozen to his seat, staring unblinkingly at his notes. Ernie cringes and wishes he would say something, anything.

  
After what feels like an eternity, Justin stands up, and without meeting Ernie’s eyes, says, “Er, excuse me,” and hurries out of the room.

  
Ernie just sits there, feeling like a complete arse. He probably just ruined his relationship with his best friend. He only hopes Justin won’t tell anyone what happened.

  
The next month is one of the worst of Ernie’s life. Justin doesn’t talk to him, avoids his eyes at the dinner table, and does his homework inside the privacy of his own bed-curtains. Susan and Hannah clearly notice something is horribly wrong, but they don’t say anything until a week and a half has gone by. When they corner Ernie in the empty common room, he wrings his hands uncomfortably and tells them about the Amortentia. They look at him with sympathy, but don’t say much because what is there to say?

  
A Saturday of laziness and cold descends upon Hogwarts during the winter holidays. Most of the remaining Hufflepuffs spend it in the common room, playing Exploding Snap by the fire. Ernie reads alone in the dormitory. It’s even more awkward now. Zacharias is home for the holidays, and it’s just Ernie and Justin.

  
“Ernie.” Ernie looks up from his book and swallows a lump in his throat. Justin crosses to Ernie’s bed and sits on the edge hesitantly. He looks at his feet.

  
“I’m sorry,” Justin mumbles. “I’ve been a bad friend.” Ernie feels a stabbing sensation in his chest. Ernie’s to blame, not Justin.

  
“No. It’s my fault. I shouldn’t’ve made you uncomfortable like that. I’m really sorry.” Justin looks at him, and Ernie can see the pain in his eyes.

  
“Ernie,” he says, and then he’s sobbing into Ernie’s chest. Ernie blinks, bewildered, and wraps his arms around Justin’s shaking body. Justin’s words come streaming out, muffled in Ernie’s sweater, caught between sobs.

  
“I’m sorry. I - the Amortentia - the-...it was you,” he confesses. Ernie can feel a wet patch on his sweater. He rubs Justin’s back soothingly until his tears wind down to small whimpers. Justin sits back and wipes his face.

  
“It’s just,” he starts. “My parents, they’d hate me if...if they knew - knew that i’m...” Ernie nods.

  
“I’m sorry,” he says. They seem to be apologizing a lot. Ernie hugs him. They break apart, but Justin stays close to Ernie. He looks at him, and he’s wonderful.

  
“God, Jus,” Ernie whispers, and they’re kissing.

 

 

 **x.**  Anthony

 

The first Potions lesson of Anthony’s sixth year is the most eventful for him, and it’s for many reasons, but mostly because of Terry.

  
Anthony can tell what the potions are on the table. Amortentia has garnered the biggest crowd of people, who are all clamoring to find out who they’re attracted to. When Slughorn begins the lesson, Hermione Granger raises her hand to give the definition for Amortentia.

  
“Excellent, Miss Granger, five points to Gryffindor. Now, would anyone else like to volunteer and tell us what they can smell? Come on, don’t be shy!” Everyone is suddenly quiet. Run the risk of confessing to their crush in front of everyone? No thanks. Slughorn’s eyes scan the room, pass over Anthony, and land on Terry. Terry winces.

  
“How about you, Mr....?” Terry stands, looking uncomfortable.

  
“Boot, sir,” He replies. Slughorn gestures for him to continue. Terry falters.

  
“Um. I can, I can smell Butterbeer? From the Three Broomsticks? And, er, wool. and...Princeton Peppermints,” he mutters. Anthony stops.

  
If anyone were to ask him of the time in his life when he felt most in shock, it would be now. Padma and Mandy are looking at him from the next table over, and whispering to each other. Anthony just can’t move.

  
Suddenly, the class is forming a line to take turns with the Amortentia, and Anthony finds himself in the middle of it. He feels numb. 'What what what?'

  
'What just happened?'

  
Terry won’t look at him. Now, Anthony is at the front of the line. He leans forward and he inhales. It’s the pages of books, musky and old. Hazelnut, sweet and sharp. And over it all is the overwhelming scent of sandalwood.

  
Terry’s cologne.

  
Terry.

  
Anthony supposes he should have seen this coming.

  
He shuffles back to his table. His head is clearer now. He’s smiling. There’s something fluttering around inside of him, trying to get out. He’s going to let it.

  
He coughs for Terry’s attention. Terry looks up at him fearfully.

  
“Princeton Peppermints, huh?” Terry nods his head, and Anthony thinks, 'How did i not notice this before?,' and curses his obliviousness. He takes a deep breath.

  
“Sandalwood. That’s what i could smell in the potion.” Terry stares at him in wonder.

  
“It’s you,” he breathes and Anthony has never been more in love. All he can do is smile, wishing he could find the words to say something.

  
Terry kisses him anyway.

 

 

 **xi.**  Susan

 

Susan is a sap, and this is certain. She believes in true love and soulmates and all kinds of gooey, disgusting things. She wants to experience these things, really experience them for herself, and she is with Hannah.

  
Hannah is Susan’s best friend, her girlfriend, and everything in between. She’s everything Susan could ask for and more and she loves her more than anything. She tells her this as frequently as she can, and Hannah calls her corny, but she loves it.

  
The Yule Ball was where Susan and Hannah started. Susan went with Justin and Hannah went with Ernie, and they all had fun, as a group of friends. Eventually, Justin and Ernie became more preoccupied with talking to each other (boys!), and Susan and Hannah took a walk outside that ended in confessions and feelings and Susan’s hands in Hannah’s curls. And they laughed. They were happy.

  
They are happy now, but less so. You-Know-Who is back, Susan’s Auntie is dead, and so is Hannah’s mother. There is talk of Hannah leaving Hogwarts for the rest of the year. Most nights, Hannah and Susan stay in the same bed, and hold each other, and cry. The world right now is scary, and they’re just two girls, barely sixteen.

  
Susan notices things. Hannah’s hair; it smells of cinnamon. Whenever she goes to Hannah’s house over summer holidays, Mrs. Abbott would make them chocolate chip cookies with the chips still melting, and Hannah smells like this even when they’re at school. And Hannah always has an odor of dirt about her. It’s not a bad smell; it’s fresh, and comforting, and earthy. Susan quite likes it.

  
It’s no surprise to Susan that these are the things she smells when she smells Amortentia. They are everything that Hannah is. Warm, inviting, beautiful. They are her favorite smells in the world. And she loves Hannah.

  
After Hannah goes up to the love potion herself, she glances up at Susan and smiles, and Susan feels that she could walk on air.

 

 

 **xii.**  Millicent

 

Millicent has been described as unfriendly her whole life. She doesn’t really mind. So what if she looks “brutish” and “menacing?” People can judge her all they want. The only people who wouldn’t describe her that way are her friends, and they’re the only ones who’ve seen past her tough exterior and gotten to know Millicent for Millicent.

  
At home, Millicent is even colder and cynical than usual. It’s hard not to be, when your parents ignore you and you spend your whole summer actually wishing you could go back to school. Millicent has gone home for the winter holidays only twice in her time at Hogwarts, for her first two years there. Once third year rolled around she refused, and has spent the holidays at Hogwarts ever since.

  
Her friends make it bearable, and help her forget about her parents. They’re really the best friends Millicent could ever ask for. However, in the past year one of those friends has become more than that. Daphne.

  
Daphne Greengrass is the girl that all the boys want and all the girls want to be. Many call her “the Slytherin Princess” for her perfect blonde hair and regal air. She isn’t that regal when she’s pinned underneath Millicent against the walls of a broom cupboard.

  
Millicent and Daphne had developed a “friends-with-benefits” dynamic last year, but Millicent’s worried she’s in too deep. And this is confirmed when she smells Daphne in the love potion. Coconut, pine forests, cherries. Sweet and tart.

  
Shit.

  
Well, that’ll be an awkward conversation to have with Daphne, Millicent thinks. 'Hey, Daph, you’ll never guess! I might possibly be in love with you and everything about you! I guess friends-with-benefits went way over my head, just like Theo and Blaise said it would! Haha!'

  
Ugh.

  
Even if Daphne didn’t hate her for that, why would she like Millicent back? Daphne’s gorgeous and Millicent’s...Millicent.

  
Stupid complicated life. Fuck.

  
And then one day they’re snogging on Millicent’s bed and Millicent is enveloped in cherries and pine and coconut and one thought flickers through her brain:

  
'This will not end well.'

  
But eventually Daphne wants to spend more time kissing and “cuddling” (Millicent does not cuddle) and less time sticking their hands down each other’s pants. So, who knows what that means?

  
But it’s sweet and fleeting and romantic and hey

  
it’s nice.

 

 

 **xiii.**  Padma

 

Mandy. Mandy Brocklehurst. Mandy.

  
She’s beautiful. She’s intelligent. She’s kind. She’s nutmeg, and sea salt, and the metallic aroma of bronze. She’s everything at once while acting like it’s nothing at all.

  
Padma’s rather in love with her.

  
Who wouldn’t be? Mandy’s...Mandy. In Padma’s opinion, there’s never been a finer person. but she could sit on her arse and wax poetic about Mandy all day, or she could go to Defense Against the Dark Arts class.

  
And catch up with Mandy in the halls.

  
And kiss her.

  
Wow.

  
Mandy’s lips are velvet, and her hands on either side of Padma’s face are warm as a fire. Or maybe that’s just the temperature of Padma’s cheeks. Or maybe it’s both.

  
Standing there, kissing the girl of her dreams, Padma suddenly is overcome with a thought. She could jump right out of the window, and she wouldn’t fall, she’d soar, and she’d glide. She’d fly.

  
Maybe that’s cheesy. But not to Padma. She recalls the Yule Ball, when she’d been Ron Weasley’s date (huge mistake). The whole time that Ron refused to dance with her, Padma had gazed at Mandy, waltzing around the room with Anthony Goldstein and looking like she was having the time of her life. Padma had never wanted to be Anthony before, but she did then. And while Ron had glared in the direction of Hermione Granger and Viktor Krum (which one had he been jealous of? it had seemed like both.), Padma had admired Mandy in her long, royal blue gown.

  
Padma and Mandy are best friends, but they’re also more than that.

  
Padma smiles against the other girl’s lips.

  
Now it’s time for class. Mandy and Padma sit by each other, and they won’t mind any amount of glaring from Snape.

  
They hold hands.

  
Padma can’t wait to tell Parvati.

  
Mandy.

  
Mandy.

  
Mandy.

 

 

 **xiv.**  Justin

 

Justin sits through his Defense Against the Dark Arts class in a panicked frenzy.

  
The potion. It was Ernie. The fucking parchment, and the apples, and the hair product. 'Ernie who’s amazing. Ernie who’s handsome, and brave, and selfless, and polite, and - STOP'

  
Oh my God.

 

Oh my God, Justin’s parents are going to kill him.

 

Because he supposes it’s impossible to hide it from himself any longer. His worst fears have been confirmed. He’s in love with Ernie. Ernie, who is his best friend, but even worse, Ernie who is a boy.

  
Shit! Fucking. Shit! Why doesn’t Justin just announce it to the whole class? Just stand on top of his desk and scream: 'Justin Finch-Fletchley is a homosexual! Did you hear that? Justin Finch-Fletchley is a huge fucking poofter queer!'

  
God!

  
In their dorm, Justin can’t even look Ernie in the eye any longer. When Ernie tells him that he could smell Justin in the potion, Justin simply leaves. This is impossible.

  
He leaves, and he avoids Ernie for the rest of the day, and then he avoids Ernie for the rest of the month. And Susan and Hannah try to talk to him (Susan and Hannah, whom, on coming out to Justin, caused him a lot of trouble. Justin eventually came to the conclusion that they can be gay, that’s fine, but I can’t. My parents don’t really know Susan and Hannah that well, anyway. I just won’t tell them. He’s definitely fine with their relationship, but his parents wouldn’t be. And that’s why he can’t ever let them know about himself.) But it doesn’t do anything. Until finally, Justin forces himself to man up and apologize. Because he knows, out of the goodness of his heart, that Ernie deserves better than him anyway. And sorry, but they just can’t be together.

  
But when he goes to tell Ernie this, his throat closes and his jaw sticks, and he can’t tell him that, not when Ernie’s right in front of him being so goddamn nice. And eventually Justin breaks. And he tells Ernie everything, about the Amortentia, about his parents. And Ernie holds him. And then he kisses him. And Justin’s heart and brain are arguing with each other, and his brain is reminding him of his parents, and their faces when they find out he’s a queer, but his heart is reminding him how Ernie makes him feel, and Justin eventually tells both of them to shut up. And he decides he’ll deal with his parents later, and will try to forget, at least for now, and he pulls Ernie as close as he can.

 

 **xv.**  Daphne

 

When Daphne thinks about it, it’s a wonder how her life is so fucking complicated.

  
She’s the Slytherin Princess. She gets what she wants, when she wants it. Even though her family is not part of the Sacred Twenty-Eight, she holds her head high and looks down on others. It’s sort of enjoyable.

  
Daphne could have any boy she wanted, yet somehow she manages to fall for Millicent Bulstrode.

  
Ah, well. Theo and Blaise had warned them.

  
She doesn’t know when she crosses the line from simply wanting to sleep with Millicent and wanting to run away and live in the countryside with her. It’s odd. One day, she thinks nothing of it, the next, it’s all that’s on her mind.

  
Part of it is probably the fact that Millicent is so grounded. Most of the Slytherins are cold and prejudiced, but Millicent is different. She gets to know people, then decides if they’re worthy of her attention or not. It’s almost admirable.

  
It also might have to do with Millicent being unfairly attractive.

  
Daphne half-expects to not smell her in Amortentia. Maybe the Fates will be even crueler and make her become attracted to Crabbe or Goyle. but the aroma of ink, dark chocolate, and the musk of smoke is unmistakable.

  
Daphne is surprised, but also understands. She just accepts it. Her parents will probably frown on any decision she makes, and being in a relationship with another girl is no different.

  
If Millicent likes her. Right, that’s an important detail.

  
Daphne isn’t sure. But she begins to drop hints that Millicent means more to her than she thinks. She’s tender and gentler more often. She knows that millicent notices. It’s only a matter of when she says something.

  
Time will tell.

 

 

 **xvi.**  Hannah

 

Hannah loves Susan more than anything. And Susan knows this.

  
But Hannah’s a paranoid person. She sees the cauldron full of Amortentia and frantically wonders if she’s going to smell Susan in it.

  
Of course she’ll smell Susan. Why wouldn’t she?

  
But will Susan smell her?

  
All throughout class, Hannah worries over this.

  
She's actually worried over a lot of things. Her classes, the House Cup, homework, the war, her mother. God, she misses Mum. Susan gets this. Her Auntie was murdered by You-Know-Who personally. It hurts, to lose someone that close to you. It hurts like hell.

  
Who knows how this war is going to end?

  
And ever since Mum died, her uncle has been telling her he’s going to pull her out of school. Nothing’s happened yet, but it’s going to. She doesn’t want to leave Hogwarts. She doesn’t want to leave her friends. She doesn’t want to leave Susan.

  
And now it seems like fretting over her relationship is trivial compared to everything else. Hannah wishes she could go back to fourth year, when Susan and her first got together, when the Dark Lord wasn’t back, when Hufflepuff was getting their rightful earned glory in the Triwizard Tournament, when her Mum was still alive. Things were so much easier then.

  
Hannah hardly registers getting in line, but somehow she’s at the front of it. Slowly, she leans forward and breathes in the Amortentia and a rush of joy fills her when she smells honey, freshly baked bread, and strawberries. It’s Susan. Of course it is. She looks up at Susan and grins. When she returns to their table, Susan says, “You smelled wonderful in the potion.”

  
And Hannah just hugs her.

  
Things are hard, they’ve been hard, and they’ll be hard for a long time. But having Susan near her is warm and cozy.

  
When Hannah leaves Hogwarts, she writes to Susan every day, and Susan always writes back.

 

**Author's Note:**

> my favorite part about this fic is that the quality of the writing slowly declines as you keep reading


End file.
